Age Ain't Nothin' But A Number

The other day, I was talking to a girlfriend of mine and she was venting about how her friend keeps asking her to go out on a week-nights. She said she couldn't because she has to get up at 5am to go to work. Her friend then proceeded to call her boring. How old do you think my girlfriend is?

I have another story for you. I have another friend who asked if I wanted to go to Happy Hour on Thursday a few weeks ago. I had to decline because I have a hard time being able to go out on the weekends let alone the weekdays. Well this other friend of mine is a strong believer in Thirsty Thursdays and Sunday Fun-Days. How old do you think he is?

Well the first story my girlfriend is 21, and in the second story my friend is 30.

Then, you take myself as an example. I am a single-mother who was married and now going through a divorce. How old do you think I am? Without knowing me and just knowing those facts about me, many would think I am at least in my thirties. Wrong! I will be twenty-five next month. Because of my situation and my circumstances I have had to grow up a lot faster than my other friends. They worry still worry about where they are going to go out or which party to go to while I worry about how I'm going to pay for preschool, and how I need to save up for new clothes for my continuously growing son.

I find it so interesting how we put so much emphasis on age as we grow up. There are so many sayings such as, "act your age, not your shoe size". What defines age anyway? In the opening examples you've got a 21 year old acting more mature than the 30 year old. She recognizes the fact that she can't go out because she has to get up and go to work in the morning. As for my other friend, he still actively practices what college students practice.

Society is telling us that how old you are is so important. You've got magazines telling women that 40 is the new 20 and television shows to back up that ideal such as "Cougar Town". If you are forty years old, why do you want to act like a twenty year old? In service one Sunday, Pastor Jim said something that stuck with me. He said something to the extent of, "It is important to hold on to your childlike qualities. But at some point, we need to grow up and stop acting like a child." There is a huge difference between being childlike, and being childish.

Today's youth is growing up faster than the youth did just one decade ago because they are being exposed to certain things that I wasn't exposed to until I was in high school. There are anti-age creams and gels and this and that. Ironically, there are times when the people who use that STILL look older than the ones that are au natuale. There are things like botox and plastic surgery that helps you "preserve your age". What the heck does that mean!?!

All of this leads me to believe that age is nothing but a number. Maturity, clearly, knows no age as depicted in the early examples. I am also a strong believer of love knows no age. My boyfriend is nearly seven years older than me. Another one of my girlfriends is married to someone who is eight years older than her. And I have another girlfriend who is dating someone who is thirteen years older than her. Although my boyfriend and I joke a lot about the difference in our age, it doesn't change the fact that we are madly and deeply in love with each other. There are couples out there whose age difference is a lot greater than mine and they are madly and deeply in love with each other as well.

There are men with women who are old enough to be that woman's father, and even grandfather. There are women with men who could be that man's mother, or even grandmother. I must admit, I think it to be a bit odd for people to have significant others young enough to be their own children. But, I think it to be odd because society says it is odd.
Now, there is a line that is drawn in this ideal. This ideal only works with adults. It is wrong, odd, and most of all, illegal when minors are involved. For example, it is wrong when a sixteen year old has real, intimate relations with someone who is twenty-six years old. Yes, the difference is only ten years, but it is illegal!

We spend our lives trying to define age and define how old we are. When you want to get to know someone, sure, how old they are is important if large age gaps are important to you. However, what you really should ask yourself is "how mature is this person?" or "how old does this person act?" because what's the use dating someone your age is he/she acts like a child?

With all that said, I'm throwing some old school your way... RIP Aaliyah




Thanks for Listening!
...until next time...